Those girls I knew once…

those girls I knew once
they walked in shoes
they flip-flopped
clacked
and danced
they drank
and laughed
and rescued each other
whether rescue was something they wanted
or not

those girls I knew once
cried together too
for each other
for love
for estrangement
for too much of each other
and not enough

those girls I knew once
floated and lolled about
on Sundays
under palm trees
eating drunken spaghetti
and washing it down with
whatever that was
talking about inappropriate
bananas
cucumbers
whatever that was
she could do things
and that’s what mattered

hey remember
wipe-gate?
that mattered too
especially when you do it
wrong

those girls I knew once
had something or other to do with
Marines
or not
with bartenders
or not
with shots
and shots
and shots
or water

those girls I knew once
could have had a group discount on
some serious
counseling, man
but we only ever finally went
one by one
we were each other’s
counsel
when I knew those girls once

I’m all better now
but I still flip-flop
clack
and dance
and
I want to know those girls
again

Ode to the Rollin’

It’s never quite and always almost
the glass half and that other grass
like Mick I
just can’t get no
perspective on
the relativity of satisfaction
like Mick I’m
always almost taking it
never quite by the tongue
I’ve got the moves
like Mick but not the swagger
like a stone
I’m just too heavy
to roll.

Terra not so Firma

clouds beneath my feet
turn into starlight
and I am floating
just now
floating off into places
and heights only whispered about before
to me
in my dreamiest
floatiest
dreams

tonight I danced
on my tippy toes
with my fiance
my dream boat ridiculous fiance
six foot plus
blue eyed
that hugh grant accent thing he’s had since birth
and those blue eyes aren’t just blue
they are magical
seeing only the best
always the best
in me
impossible I thought
but now I know
he’s true
and I’m a believer

Better Different

No, but tell me a story
I want to believe in you
I want to believe
that you’re not just like
normal regular room temperature
me
like yawned about forgettable adventureless
me

tell me something fantastic
that I don’t deserve
something crazy about you
that makes me
lucky
better
different
colorful
just because
I know
you

tell me a story
that never ends
something that will fascinate
me and everyone I know
for
ever
something that makes our jaws
drop
something that we’ve never heard before
something ridiculous and impossible
and not all the way
true

no, tell me a story
I need to believe
please, tell me a story
spare me the truth
I don’t want to know
that I’m just like
you

saying it now

soft white feelings
whip me up like cool whip
fluffy and airy I float all
misty and cool and shiny like the moon hiding under a branch
I’m the rightiest keys on the piano at mom’s
high and tinkly and croony like Timberlake and
I’m loving you but
you can’t feel me
no
you don’t know
you don’t know
you don’t know
because I don’t say
I don’t say
I just come back down to earth
in the kitchen

and I don’t say

the Cemetery of Love Gone By

In the cemetery of love gone by
in the cemetery
of endings
in the cemetery of tombs
and stones and
cold hard lifeless
heavy things
in the cemetery of love gone by
I am the Living

I have walked here
amongst the memories
swiss cheese specter holed
drilled through and bitter
wormy with questions
and shadows and doubt

if you bite into the unanswered past
bitter answers may fill your mouth
and you can never spit and spit and
spit it out enough

like traps
questions hang in living rooms
an impatient noose
waits for the stumbling
fool to wander in
and wonder enough
to ask

then slippery sling goes the knot
answers are clutched like
currency that can be
tendered for time
more time
lungs clench as oxygen
abandons the relationship
because
everybody knows truth will rot away
when it’s held in the dark for too long
and that ugly truth
will show its face
eventually
and scare
love
to death

I was in the dark
for too long
Truth was right in front of me
but I refused my eyes
it’s not so ugly
when you peel away
your own
expectations
it’s really just something
unexpected
it’s really just something to
accept
it’s only just an
inhale
an exhale
a blink of the eye
and now I am at peace
with the ugliness of Truth
I have acquired a taste
for the freedom it brings

and now I walk
amongst the cold hard
facts
that one didn’t love me
anymore
I never loved him
at all

I do not come here for comfort
I do not come here for compliments
I do not come here for companionship
those bones
those sockets
those empty shoes
that life
that fire
all ashes and dirt
bones bring no comfort
gnarled hands do not hold
buried feet do not accompany
there is no warmth here for me
there is only Truth

these cold hard facts
these skeletal tales
their rigid backs lie
subservient in dirt
faceless remainders
grey reminders
unceremonious headstoned markers
tick tock taken away
RIP or don’t
happily ever neverminded me here
in the cold hard
dirt
where love comes
and where love goes
by

these cold hard
facts
these cold hard
bones
these cold hard
headstones
turn to stepping stones
a path for me
a path for me
in the cemetery of endings
the Living walk through
upon the cold hard
Truth